Ebb and Flow
the friends i made here are one of a kind.
its week 9 (out of 15) and im suffering from the 2nd stress induced cold sore ive had in my life. Ninas bought masks for our workshop nights, and insists i need vitamin B which she will bring tomorrow. after 18 hours of shut eye, and 1 litre of OJ, ive paid for my air tickets and booked the hotel in TST. the 20 dollar price difference and peer pressure didnt make nina change her decision. i have learnt from previous experiences that when someone really wants to keep something from you, they will. Im trying to be as sensitive as i can to not probe, but shes asking me if i wanted her pair of jeans. there i was digressing for the WHOLE block down towards kent street. before i finally said 'if you think can fit...give it to me.' I hope i didnt come across as being unappreciative, but her telling me bout how shes thrown her stuff out came across to me as a hint that she might not be back, infact we were discussing about the possibilities of her japan trip. she sounded like shed gotten it all planned in her head, but of course, nobody knows but her.
its been tough. its my 1st entry about this. and the last i needed someone to talk to i found myself unable to call D, selfishly worrying that i cannot handle her during my window period of vulnerability. so there you go, this is how i really feel, and i cant cry about it cos it wouldnt help anyone. please dont probe. i just needed to do this.
its week 9 (out of 15) and im suffering from the 2nd stress induced cold sore ive had in my life. Ninas bought masks for our workshop nights, and insists i need vitamin B which she will bring tomorrow. after 18 hours of shut eye, and 1 litre of OJ, ive paid for my air tickets and booked the hotel in TST. the 20 dollar price difference and peer pressure didnt make nina change her decision. i have learnt from previous experiences that when someone really wants to keep something from you, they will. Im trying to be as sensitive as i can to not probe, but shes asking me if i wanted her pair of jeans. there i was digressing for the WHOLE block down towards kent street. before i finally said 'if you think can fit...give it to me.' I hope i didnt come across as being unappreciative, but her telling me bout how shes thrown her stuff out came across to me as a hint that she might not be back, infact we were discussing about the possibilities of her japan trip. she sounded like shed gotten it all planned in her head, but of course, nobody knows but her.
its been tough. its my 1st entry about this. and the last i needed someone to talk to i found myself unable to call D, selfishly worrying that i cannot handle her during my window period of vulnerability. so there you go, this is how i really feel, and i cant cry about it cos it wouldnt help anyone. please dont probe. i just needed to do this.
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on Wednesday, May 02, 2007 at 11:33 PM.
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